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Etiquette and Manners for Crossdressers

Women’s fashions may come and go but some things should never change. Common sense manners and etiquette fall into this bracket, particularly when you are trying to portray yourself as an authentic female. Quite simply, manners add to femininity, helping you to be graceful, chic and full of confidence in your chosen feminine gender role. Etiquette is a set of procedures to be observed in civilized society and manners are standards of behavior for treating others. If you layer on traditional female etiquette with a wish to treat others as you wish to be treated (in your female guise) then you will master this lesson on femininity quickly.

Whilst some of these tips are physical, some are simple disciplines to be learned, which in time will become second nature when you are presenting as female.

Say Thank-you

As the picture above says…. Mark your gratitude for both small and big courtesies afforded to you. Whether someone holds the door open for you or they accompany you to a support group for the first time, make sure to say thank-you. If it’s in the moment, do it audibly so it can be heard. Don’t mumble. Other instances may require a text, email or even a written ‘thank-you’.

Be Kind and Considerate

This is a rule you should develop in both male and female guise as a central tenet of how you live your life. Treat others how you wish to be treated yourself. Others may let you down in this respect but I guarantee if you lead the way in your female guise it will pay off. Be aware of others around you and look for ways you can help and support them. The Greek writer Aesop said: “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted”. Ingrain this in your daily life and it will have a marked effect on your feminine being.

Be Well Groomed

There are so many aspects of your male to female transformation from shaping to fashion sense and everything in between. No matter how good you are at all the other dressing aspects, if you do not present as well groomed, you will not come across as ‘lady-like’. Ensure you have nail tips on or have a manicure. Make sure your makeup is on point, your wig is in good condition and that your hosiery is not laddered (make sure to have a spare when out).

Be Punctual

Many think being late for a meeting, a dinner date or just a coffee in our modern world is ok. It’s not. Being late shows a lack of respect for the other person(s) and no self-respecting lady ever wants to disrespect another person. Do whatever it takes with your time planning and make sure you are on time and relaxed.

Don’t Drink Too Much

This is pretty obvious but it needs saying. Most people when drunk are loud, rude and obnoxious and it becomes embarrassing for those around. Stay in control and poised at all times and cut down on your alcohol intake. Being poised and relaxed looks chic and sexy. Being under the influence looks and sounds messy and usually all your male traits will be exhibited. It’s not a good look!

Always Make Eye Contact and Listen

Not only when talking to someone you know but also when you meet someone for the first time, look them right in the eye and make sure to actively listen and react to what they are saying. Focus on the person or persons in front of you. Not looking someone in the eye can be regarded as either not paying attention, un-confident or just not trustworthy/shifty. None of these are positive female traits we want to be identified with. Look, listen and smile and you will appear a much more attractive feminine persona.

Table Manners

This may be thought of as a quaint old tradition given the modern-day style of eating on the go or in front of a screen watching Netflix. However, this is a simple way of shifting away from male mannerisms to much more female traits and appearance by simply improving your table manners. Ladies are much more poised and compact sitting at a table. Keep arms and elbows off the table and very close to the side of the body to take up less room. A male tends to be much more open and uses a lot more real-estate at the table. Chew with your mouth closed and never talk with food in your mouth; that is not very lady-like.

Be Happy & Confident!

Everyone one has their ‘off days’ but don’t let that be exhibited to others you have interaction with. Don’t snap or be rude or demanding. Rise above your sad/bad feelings and push through so that you always appear calm, relaxed and content in your female personna. It may feel forced but staying bright and smiling will actually help change your mood. By the same token, if someone you come in contact with is harsh and takes their mood out on you, try to understand that there is something unhappy going on in their life. Be empathetic rather than combative. Empathy is a strong and confident female trait.

Be a Good ‘Sister’ & Friend

If you have other CD girlfriends make sure you are a good support to them. Be there when they are feeling ‘down’ and try to pick them up. If they make a mistake when you are out with them, don’t embarrass them in public; be tactful and do it gently and in private. Always give advice from a position of love and support and try to help them be a better woman. Share any feminizing secrets with other ‘sisters’ – sharing is caring. Be there to help anyone who needs it whether they are a crossdresser or not. Some may call that the mothering instinct, we just call it good manners.

Try not to think of etiquette and manners as being intimidating. Rather than strict rules, they are standards of behavior that can help you both feel and look more feminine. Use the tips to eradicate male roughness and in place, let the tips bring female refinement. This not only leads to poise and femininity, but it shows character that will be admired by those around you. For further feminizing solutions make sure to read the regular updates to our crossdressing tips blog to get more inspiration.

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