Crossdressing in public for the first time can be a very terrifying experience. You will start to ask yourself all kinds of questions. Will I pass? Will I see someone I know? What do I wear? How much makeup should I put on? These are all very real questions and can often cause someone to ultimately decide to keep their Femme selves behind closed doors. But don’t let your mind get the better of you. If you’re reading this, there is a good chance you may be one of these people. Well, we are here to tell you to not be terrified and that there are ways to take baby steps and ease yourself into being dressed in public. Plus, we have some advice from some of our favorite Glamour Girls to help you feel more at ease.
The first thing we would suggest is to try and put your fears at ease. It can be extremely stressful to go out in public the first time as most people’s biggest fear is seeing someone that they know and being outed. Just about everyone started dressing in private on their own. In the safety of your own home, you can act and dress anyway you want when En Femme. But when going out, you need to do some little extras to make sure you can just blend in. A good rule of thumb is to dress conservatively as it will draw less attention to you and you’ll be able to blend in more. Make sure that your makeup is on point as well.
When you’re selecting somewhere to go, start small. Just go for a car ride. Maybe take a walk around a mall during less busy hours. Try and go out at night as the darker time of day will help cover you up a bit more as well. And be sure to go somewhere that is low risk and safe so you can feel more at ease in your environment.
Finding a Trans friendly place or an establishment that caters to the community is definitely a great way to feel comfortable being out as you will be surrounded by others dressed En Femme, which in turn can get you to meet some new girlfriends and create an environment where you can go out in a group when you go out again.
We wanted to get you some advice from people we trust, so we sat down with some of our girls who we consider experts and they were more than happy to share some tips with all of you first-timers.
Glamour Boutiques very own Dawn Gold – “Go to a nice neighborhood that is safe so you can feel safe. Try taking a ride to a town about 20 minutes or so away to lessen your chance of bumping into someone you know. For example, I enjoy going to New Hope, PA as it is very LGBT friendly and no one will bat an eyelash at you. Nicer towns have nicer places to go to so you can go to a nice restaurant and have dinner with a girlfriend and not feel uncomfortable. Two great destinations where you can test the waters and are a low risk is Starbucks, which as a company is one of the best in the world when it comes to the Trans community or a movie theatre as you will be out in public, but in a dark theatre where you can just sit there En Femme and test the waters of what it feels like to be out.”
Shannon (Glamour Girl Finalist) – My advice would be to enjoy your elation! You will experience something you’ve never felt before, and I promise it will be wonderful. Breathe in every second of it! You may be nervous while getting ready – that’s absolutely normal. By night’s end, though, you’ll now possess the courage to create this magnificent moment again!
Nikki Hunter (2018 Sexy Legs Champion) – “Why isn’t anyone looking at me?” was my first thought. When going out for the first time, it can be nerve-racking, but the thing to remember is that no one particularly cares nearly as much as you do. Unless you’re dressed up in a wedding gown or like a street hooker, no one will even notice you. If you are very fearful, you’ll bring negative attention on yourself. Keep your head high, walk with confidence and remember that most people are usually so self-absorbed in their own little world, you have nothing to worry about!
Jill Smith (2018 Glamour Girl Grand Champion) – “Girlfriends are amazing! While it can be simultaneously exhilarating and completely terrifying going out dressed in public for the first time, there is nothing you can’t do when you are supported and surrounded by girlfriends!”
Madison Emily (Eye Candy Girl) – “While going out in public for the first time was truly terrifying for me, I mustered up all my courage and just tried to be as fabulous as I possibly could. If you’re going to go out, go all out!”
Tips: Wear clothes that fit well. The fit is really important and helps with your overall appearance. Accessorize with sexy heels, jewelry, and a cute purse.
Donna Kelli (2014 Glamour Girl Grand Champion) – “If possible, have a partner with you for safety but do go where ever you have dreamed of going in public, even if it’s just to buy a pair of pantyhose. Practice, practice practice…and be confident in who you are. If your voice is an issue go somewhere you won’t need to speak very much. I worked very hard on my voice, its one of the things that girls ask me about when we meet because I sound like a woman. I practiced a lot on the phone and have ordered my fast food over the speaker as a woman. When they refer to you as ma’am then you know your voice is working. Pick a place you feel will be safe so your first experience isn’t your worst experience.”
Thanks girls! No matter your fears or apprehension, taking baby steps initially is a good way to go. Start small. If you do not have any girlfriends (either biological females or fellow CDs), try to go somewhere that is frequented by fellow CD’s or Trans girls and make some friends. The first step is to walk out that door and after that, little by little you’ll feel more confident and at ease as your femme self.
Let us know about your first time out as we would love to follow up this article with first-timer stories. If you are going out for the first time after reading this article, we want to know how it went. You can email us at [email protected] or by messaging us on our Facebook page.
For more M to F tips, head over to our blog and we always want to hear from you on articles you would like to see in the future.