Eye Candy of the Month: Jennifer Marx

Every now and then, someone comes along with a story that’s impossible to forget. This month’s Eye Candy feature introduces a captivating personality whose journey is filled with transformation, creativity, and the courage to embrace authenticity!

Let’s start by telling everyone where you are from?

I was born in the farmlands of the Midwest, but I’ve lived in San Francisco for the last 45 years. SF has changed dramatically over that timespan and is now a beautifully supportive city for trans women and men. It’s quite wonderful to live in this bubble; it gives me great strength.

When did you first start dressing, and how did it come about?

I first knew I had a strong girl side when I was 13. In many ways, it was more of a rejection of male toxicity, but soon thereafter, I discovered my sister’s clothes and the sweetness of a girl’s perspective. I repressed this for many decades until 2019, when my 38 year old daughter triggered a revelation in me. Over the next decade, she helped me explore and understand my feminine side. After a 5 day ‘girls weekend’ with her in Seattle, Jennifer was born on January 19th 2020.

I now consider myself to be “Twin Gender”. Which means I have a feminine side and a masculine side. I want to embrace both and explore how they can evolve, each elevating the other, with the special charms that each has to offer. Over time, there has been considerable blending of both sides into a unified whole. This has come from moving beyond socialized gender norms.

That said, my most joyful moments in life are when I am completely attired in full makeup, a cute dress, and heels… When I took that first step, out the door in my hotel room in Seattle with my daughter, I just wanted to know what it would feel like to be pretty for just one moment… Little did I know, it’s possible to feel pretty every day.

How did you come up with your Femme name?

Jennifer was the main character in one of the first stories I read about crossdressing… I deeply identified with her character.

Since 2023, I have used Jennifer as my middle name when writing and professionally as an architect. It may seem like a small thing, but it has had a significant impact. It makes me smile so very deeply when I am introduced/ or I introduce myself as John Jennifer Marx, it opens multiple doors to discuss gender on different levels with varied groups of people.

How often do you dress?

There are two parts involved in answering this question. I dress every day, but I only get the chance to dress in full makeup about once a week. Work gets in the way, based on the 90 minutes of prep it takes to transform.

Every evening after dinner, my wife and I change into pajamas. In my case, this means I fall into an ocean of ethereal nylon… In so many ways, it is a transformative state of bliss. All of the cares of the world face away, and I am gracefully Jennifer.

Are you married/in a relationship? If yes, are you able to share your female self with your partner?

My wife and I are celebrating our 40th anniversary this year… I shared Jennifer with her 6 years ago. Her issues were not about my feminine side, but rather why I didn’t tell her for 34 years. It was hard to explain to her how difficult it is to tell the first few people; she was more upset that my daughter knew first. Since then, she has been very supportive. We go out together quite often for Girl Adventures.

Tell us what goes into getting the perfect photo?

While lighting, composition, and setting are key components, I feel the most important aspect is your mood. The best photos reflect your personality and emotional state… happy, mischevious, alluring, or striking… the easiest way to the perfect photo is through a genuine smile.

What are some of your favorite outfits/fashions?

I am especially fond of late 60s and early 70s Mod mini dresses and Gogo Boots. I imagine this is due to the fact that it was the prevailing fashion when I was a teenager… but I was not able to dress back then. I’m trying to make up for lost time. 

I also love “Fit and Flare” dresses as they help with my body type.

When I dress, I want to stand out and be provocative in elevating fashion. Sadly, San Francisco women do not dress up like they did 60 years ago. Oftentimes, I am the only person dressed in a creative way.

Stockings or pantyhose?

Stockings… always stockings and garters.

Heels or flats? 

I’m a heels kind of girl… 3”-4”. I also love heeled boots.

Favorite places to go when dressed?

Art museums, ballet, concerts, Burning Man, professional events, and going out for dinner… anything that will be joyful.

After I started dressing in public, I sent photos to my daughter. She responded that I never smiled like I do when I am dressed… she calls this “Girl Glow”. I LOVE to glow, and try to find every opportunity to do it. I would love for all the men in the world to experience the Glow in their adult lives and to understand how important it is to the future of humanity.

Go to accessories for a night out?

I just got my ears pierced last summer (a rite of passage), so I am obsessed with provocative earrings. Otherwise, I like to make a statement with a creative necklace and the right perfume.

Who is/are your female role model(s) and why?

There are so many, where to start…

Architects. Zaha, Julia Morgan, Jeane Gang, Manon Mollard… all strong, creative women who change the profession through their creativity and talent.

Artists: Frida Kahlo, Dorothea Lange, Diane Arbus, Dylan Mullvaney… who all questioned and celebrated the human condition, and they promoted the evolution of women.

Actresses: Marilyn Monroe, Anne Hathaway, Emma Thompson, Audrey Hepburn, Helen Mirren, Susan Sarandon, Terri Garr, and Margot Robbie, who started in and produced that delightfully subversive film about gender… Barbie.

Tell us some fun facts about yourself. What are your hobbies (either when dressed or not), likes, things you do in your spare time, or anything else you would like to share?

I am a practicing artist, poet, architect and muse.

I also see myself as a student of absurdity, paradox, kindness, and art.

As a poet, I have written about gender and published a poem about my journey entitled “The Burden of Lying”. I am currently writing a memoir with the same title as the poem. The book begins and ends with a discussion of my gender struggle, with emergence and repressing my true self. The book ends with celebrating current successes and my hope for the future.

I have an active life in the culture and arts of San Francisco, including the Magic Theatre, The San Francisco Art Institute, and Burning Man. All three of these communities have been highly supportive of Jennifer.

Any stories you would like to share about yourself and your journey?

Mine, like many girls, has been a long journey of denial and repression. After coming out to my wife and daughters, I have now reached out to almost everyone I know in one form or another. With rare exceptions, this has been a very positive experience. (Remember, I do live in one of the most progressive cities in the world). For my conservative friends, I talk about freedom… specifically the freedom of self-expression. I also discuss the need to separate biology from sexuality, from gender. These are interrelated, yet very different things. Once people understand (if they can grasp this) that gender can be seen as a social construct, rather than a strictly biological one, it seems easier for them to embrace gender as a wide spectrum that is rich and varied, rather than a constructive binary.

Work has been the most complex part of my journey. I am the Chief Artistic Officer of an architecture firm in San Francisco, and, while in that role, we have won over 250 international design awards. It is a demanding profession, which is still more than a bit of a ‘boys club’. In 2023, I came out to my entire profession by publishing a book on gender in architecture, intitled “Towards Abundance”.

Since I don’t fully dress every day, I have found it to be confusing for clients, who have known my male side over many years, to switch back and forth. Therefore, I generally schedule my dressing around client meetings. Perhaps this dynamic may change over time.

If you have social media, what is the best way for others to follow you?

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jenniferanne22222/?hl=en

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenny.austin.35728/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

Flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/58693099@N00/

Before we go, would you like to send a message to your fellow girls out there or a closing statement?

Your very existence as a feminine gender, even if you are deep in the closet, makes the world a better place. Your passion gives me hope that we can open the world to what lives in our hearts. I am looking to help the world better understand gender identity and the need to give us a place in their heart.

Never give up on your dreams… it took me 62 years. If only I was brave enough to have started earlier. Sadly, that was NOT possible for me then and is still not an option for many girls in most parts of the world. Stay strong girls, we love you.

Would you like to share your story and become an Eye Candy Girl?

Let us know by emailing us at[email protected] or message us on our Facebook page. And be sure to check out more great tips and articles on our blog!