Let’s start by telling everyone where you are from?
Born and raised in Bucks County, PA (Philadelphia Suburbs)
When did you first start dressing and how did it come about?
Unlike many girls I met, I am considered a late bloomer. I started dressing about 9 years ago. It came about as a complete surprise and totally unexpected. One night I came up with the bright idea of trying on a pair of my wife’s old panties that had been lying in my closet. It was pure curiosity and next thing I knew a whole pandora’s box opened that I could not close. I was able to unlock another side of me that never knew existed or refused to ever acknowledge. Yes, it scared the daylights out of me at first. It took some time for me to finally get a grip on this. But in doing so, I learned a lot about myself.
How did you come up with your Femme name?
It was very easy for me. It came from a girl I knew in middle school that had the name and thought it was so beautiful. It stuck with me all these years.
How often do you dress?
About once a month give or take. I only go out en-femme about 5 to 6 times a year at best. I would love to go out more, but family, work, and life gets in the way.
Are you married/in a relationship? If yes, are you able to share your female self with your partner?
I am happily married. It will be 30 years for me. My lovely wife knows but chooses not to participate nor be very supportive as expected. Since this is something that I started doing long after we were married, I cannot fault her for her feelings toward it. Still, I felt it was important for her to know and be transparent about it. She deserves that respect. As for my children, only my daughter knows. I have not told my son. They are now out of school. I decided that it is more important to be their father and let this just be something I can enjoy in private. That attitude may change over time.
Tell us what goes into getting the perfect photo?
For getting the perfect photo, besides the obvious lighting, pose, dress, and makeup, it comes down to attitude. If you don’t feel good about yourself, dress, or makeup, your picture will never look good enough. Have a good attitude and most importantly, have fun with the experience!
What are some of your favorite outfits/fashions?
I love wearing dresses and skirts. Women’s fashion has so many more choices than men’s. Both dresses and skirts give us so much more variety in clothing choices and are all so pretty with different styles, colors, and textures. Of course, lingerie is so much fun to wear in the evening. My style is conservative, classy, and elegant. At least that is the look I strive to achieve and compliment my conservative upbringing.
Stockings or pantyhose?
I wear both, but in reality, I tend to wear pantyhose more. My agreement with my wife does not give me the flexibility to shave my legs, so I need the coverage to disguise them. In general, I don’t really have a real preference for either one.
Heels or flats?
I prefer heels, but wear flats when appropriate. Admittedly, I don’t have great feet, so I don’t wear sky high heels. Kitten heels and 3 ½ to 4 inch heels are fine and work well for me.
Favorite places to go when dressed?
I am not much of a bar scene person as I am not much of a drinker. I love to go to clubs and enjoy dancing. I also enjoy going to trans/crossdresser conferences hanging out with others like me. I enjoy being social and find when I am dressed that I am more of a social butterfly. Any place I can go and be social are the ideal places. Because I know what I do is not acceptable for some people, I tend to go to LGBT friendly places. I don’t have the courage to go to mainstream places yet, mostly for safety reasons. I hope to get over that fear sometime in the future.
Go to accessories for a night out?
One of the greatest aspects of crossdressing for me is the ability to wear all different types of jewelry. I am a bling girl. I would say the more bling, the better, but I have been taught, less is best. So, to keep it real I choose rings, bracelets, and necklaces that shine and compliment my outfits. I love earrings as well; I find they make me feel so feminine. And that is what this is all about.
Who is/are your female role model(s) and why?
I find myself to a small extent emulating my mother. She always dressed very classy and elegantly growing up. I adore the styles worn by Elizabeth Taylor, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis. Those are the women I try to emulate when dressed. As for my contemporaries, definitely Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox. As for crossdressers, I have been told by multiple people, I look a lot like Heidi Phox. I think Heidi and I have very similar styles and she has been a great inspiration to me.
Tell us some fun facts about yourself. What are your hobbies (either when dressed or not), likes, things you do in your spare time, or anything else you would like to share?
I would say I am just a normal guy. I love sports, football followed by baseball. I enjoy playing golf and wish I had more time to do that. Something unique about me is my penchant for 1950’s antique cars. I own and show a late 1950’s Oldsmobile. I have had an old car bug since I was 12 years old. After discovering the classic 1957 Chevrolet Bel-Air prices got out of control, I looked for other cars that were styled similarly and ended up with Oldsmobile. It also helps that I came from an Oldsmobile family with my father and uncles, all owning Oldsmobile’s of the 1950’s and 1970’s. Naturally, I was drawn to that brand. Of course, you know, I had to buy a 1950’s dress to go with it. It just would not be right to do that!
Any stories you would like to share about yourself and your journey?
I thought I was absolutely crazy. But I made a bold decision to attend a Femme Fever event in Long Island, NY. I knew no one. I had no idea what to expect except to meet other cross-dressers like me. I made the three hour drive up there, by myself, planning every step, outfit, shoes, etc. I spent weeks prior deciding and planning my outfit. I was so excited and petrified at the same time. This would be only my second time ever out as Abby and no one to help mentor me. (Footnote: My first time out, I had a fellow crossdresser help me out the door. Sadly, she passed away unexpectedly. I will never forget her friendship and mentorship.) Anyway, I got all dressed up and makeup done. I stepped out of my hotel room and down the walkway I spotted another girl waiting for transportation to the event. A little shy and
extremely nervous, we met and introduced ourselves. I learned we are similar in age, work in the same industry, and have very similar circumstances. That night we became such good friends that she has become one of my best cross-dressing friends, among many others, today. You just never know who you will cross paths with.
If you have social media, what is the best way for others to follow you?
I am not much into the social media arena. I am an old school gal. I prefer meeting in person and enjoying great conversation with people. The best way to reach me is through email
[email protected] and I am on Crossdresser Heaven (Abigail Kingston).
Before we go, would you like to send a message to your fellow girls out there or a closing statement.
I would. Growing up in a conservative household of the 1970’s and 80’s, I always felt the pressure society and family put on me to be the perfect man. My father was a very successful businessman, and I personally put a lot of pressure on myself to succeed both in occupation and raising a family. Much of this pressure, right or wrong, came from the expectations I perceived from people I grew up with. In this pursuit, I worked hard in College, worked long hours to build a career, and spent my 30’s and 40’s raising my children and doing what I could to nurture my marriage. I don’t look back with any regrets but to be honest, I never took care of myself. In discovering my crossdressing, it initially scared the daylights out of me. I did not understand why I felt the way that I did when cross-dressed and it is so against everything I
was raised to be. I guess you could call this my rebellion against society or everyone. I have come to terms with my cross-dressing now and have found that it can be enjoyed, with or without my wife and family. Though my crossdressing represents a very small part of life, the shame and fear have subsided (and little therapy has helped me along the way).
For those of you starting out, or figuring out what this all means, make this feminine side of your “me” time. A timeout from not only your male world and all the pressures that go with it, but the world itself. Most statistics put crossdressing males somewhere between 3 to 5 percent of the male population. Crossdressing has been going on for centuries, before biblical times, and though it may still be taboo, it will continue for every generation ahead of us. Perhaps we are the unlucky lucky ones that have an innate ability to enjoy an activity that allows us to touch a part of our human personality representing our vulnerability and at the same time relieving stresses of the everyday world. Find some cross-dressing friends to share this side of you. We all need a little help from friends and, most important, embrace it!
Would you like to share your story and become an Eye Candy Girl?
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